I have now been a full blown bona fide blogger for just over a year. And as a result the world has changed irrefutably. Well, maybe not…but my world sure has and that’s a start. Who knows, maybe the rest will follow. In these days of monumental trump-it led upheaval and strife (Trump and Brexit, get it?) more surprising things have happened. In truth I’m very aware that there have been scant to zero ripples in the worlds of biting satire, big business ethics or self betterment bibles as a result of my somewhat ignored and forlorn blog. But actually, at this stage, I’m comfortable with that. Time for a good pause to reflect on my erstwhile journey into a new world, and have a stab at what next.
I guess it’s a suitable juncture to regale the tale of why after so many years just being a “normal” executive, I’ve decided to take on this expedition to Blog-dom and tell a few home truths. For a long time I believed that life was all about getting on. Do the right things, to the best of your ability, in life and in business, and good things will happen to you as a result. And to a broad degree this is what has happened to me. Progression and success. But a sense of true fulfilment and satisfaction? Less so. And the more I glance around at those that I’m lucky enough to share the higher branches of the Executive tree with, I realise that most wouldn’t know the right thing if it formed an orderly queue and licked their noses. Or more likely, licked something rather more pungent. So I wanted to do something more – and different. And create something.
I had conditioned my own mind to believe that creativity was something done by other people. People somehow smarter and better than me – or at least wired differently. My role was to take this creativity and turn it into action, certainty, delivery. Then I had the awakening. In truth I never believed in all that epiphany mumbo jumbo. Again, something that happened to others, and most likely just a self publicity fuelled stunt. And yet just over a year ago, there I was, turning into a fully fledged badge wearing member of the epiph-club. Suddenly as a result of the type of Executive retreat course that I had always privately, and sometimes not so privately, ridiculed, I was transforming. Giant doors opening up in my mind and in my soul. The cogs of my cognisance whirring like an incessant deep drill. And suddenly my life, my ambition and my direction felt renewed. Real. Worthy. And most wonderfully of all, the fear that had silently eaten away at me for years, was gone in a flash.
What has changed? Well for me, a whole lot. My approach to most things has changed – no more hiding under the parapet hoping things will work out. Face the real issues and sort them out. Be positive with others and most importantly with yourself. Stop wasting time. It’s precious, so do stuff that’s precious. Self reflection time. Breathe the air. I’ve taken up running and found that I love it. I’ve made a principled stand for something i believe to be really important and as a result my job is gone. My career is in limbo with some really big choices to make, but it feels ok – more than ok in fact. I’ve got even bigger life choices lurking. And they don’t scare me in the least. And most pertinently and rewardingly a feeling that somehow I have been able to unleash the pent up creative juices that have now finally started to flow. Into this blog. That makes me feel better. But that hardly anyone else ever reads. So my summary? A big big year for me, but still loads more to do to change my own world, let alone the world around me.
And speaking of the world around me, what the hell is going on? It seems to me that it’s been a colossal year for the world at large as well. Can that really be a coincidence? The reality of the series of bizarre decisions made by supposedly informed pockets of democratic civilisation has started to land. An ego obsessed orange president spouting obscenities and denying the existence of indisputable facts is scarily becoming the norm. A tinpot dictator is starting to sound credible as he sprays around his random warheads. Nations and societies are more divided and derided than ever before. And a planet that is being drained, bullied and eaten alive by a seemingly ignorant non caring set of blasé parasites unable to see beyond the end of their communal snout. Seems to me we are at a very real crunch point in existence. And the journey from here ain’t going to be pleasant. Even with my new positive outlook on life, there is so much danger on the horizon that it should be truly frightening for anyone who really stops to reflect. Apart from me of course as fear as been banished, hopefully permanently.
So, over the 12 months of my blogs existence, what have I learnt? For starters I’ve learnt that just having a creative release is heaven. Just being able to get my thoughts and musings, my rants and raves, out of my head and into some sort of poorly put together flow has breathed new life into me as a person. Those of you that have bothered to find, read, like, or follow, I love you for it. And I don’t deserve it. It’s entirely possible that this passage is the most rambling of them all, yet I do not apologise for it. You see the thing is, getting stuff out of your mind is good for you. A release of stress at the very least. And hopefully more. Hopefully something that resonates with others.
What will I do now? Carry on of course. But make it even better! I have time now, which is the ultimate luxury item that it would be a crime to waste. As I start to read other blogs, as I start to build other projects, as I start to read up on “how to write”, “how to blog” and maybe even “how to get published”, I am truly excited about the opportunity I have for a new and different mindset to create for me a new and different life. If I grasp it. Which I will. And if it doesn’t work out? Then at least I won’t grow old regretting not trying. The world needs and loves a trier. More so than ever now. My hands is up. Is yours?
strangefishbigpond 